Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

DERP

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

Whats worse than suicide? death

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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