A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society, so she returned to the kitchen and continued to make her master's sandwhich.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

roses are red, violets are blue, penis

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

i dont fisish anythi

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

Q: Human being? A: False. Jew.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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