Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

The Blonde walked into a wall.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

10 kids are on a bus. It's just a normal bus, it takes the kids to school and lets them off.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had one nut

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

Forget about them, do not compare yourself to those beneath you, you always wanted to help as many as possible, in a world where everyone fights for themselves only.

what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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