Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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No

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why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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p lkl

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What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

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why am I writing this...im bored

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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