Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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roses are blue violets are red heres a gun now your dead

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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A man walked into a bar. That hurt.

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How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

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Q. whats worse then eating a slice of cheese? A. Finding out your mom has a penis

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This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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When The bus came by Jimmy went bye-bye

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What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? I don't know really

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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hi

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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The WPGA tour

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Two Iranian men walk into a bar and order a Coke and a Lemonade. The Barman said take a seat and he'll bring them over.

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oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

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roses are red violets are indigo

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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