What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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Q: What did the clown say when he got in a car accident? A: Nothing. He died.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

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roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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What did the fat man do? He fell over...

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Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops