What is three times more dangerous than war? Three wars.

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

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What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Orchids are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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what's the difference between Michael Jackson and Acne? Acne is a skin problem caused by chemical imbalance usually found in teenagers. Michael Jackson was a singer and dancer who should've been able to escape tasteless jokes upon his death.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, the holocaust didn't actually happen, besides I hate jews

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor. wheres my tractor

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why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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I think I am done here friend, it always comes to this, it has always been easier for me to repair whatever is wrong with others and get my kicks out of that, as I know I can and will repair everything wrong with myself, but its hard as hell, I mean I never give up, ever. But that does not change the fact that I am broken, and that simply deciding that I am not, is far from enough, its a choice indeed, but its like deciding to constantly walk trough hell, and sometimes that hell is also called living, that too is always a choice, And believe me, I would never quit, I guess that if this hell I struggle trough has so many nice things in it, it just feels like hell at times. I mean the main motivation behind my ability to help others, has always been searching for answers low and high, and when what I have learned trough life helps others, but barely scratches the surface of the armor I am confined within, I lose hope, do you believe that my desire to help humanity grow, derived from my own incompetence at curing myself?

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What's worse then your pets death? I don't know I asked you.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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