Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

THIS!!!!!!! IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SPARTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

the nintendo 3ds is being released this week. its the first 3d portable gaming device that doesnt require glasses, also known as a ball...

Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...