How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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The power of Mindfuck: What if you can only walk left when you are right? And if you can walk right when you are the only one left? What is left when everything is right? Moral: Create a right world by taking the left road? YOU PIECE OF FILTH!

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what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What is worse than eating shoxy poulet.? Nothing

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

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Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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KENNAH CAMPIONS LAUGH

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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