There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A black guy, a Jew and a Mexican walked into a bar...so I didn't....not because of their race but because I had already spent all of my money at the gay bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your parents are dead. And happy birthday!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A black man breaks into a car, he doesn't steal anything because that would a violation of the car owner's privacy.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how does wasabi stay open during summer because tiffany is a nice person

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did then plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

thumb_up thumb_down -11

"Hey, did you hear that the Dungbeetles got a divorce? They live in California so she got half his shit."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

thumb_up thumb_down -11

So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops