There once was a man from Nantucket, he was a very nice person and had many friends.

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

The other day I was talking to this guy... Nice guy

Question: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Answer: Being raped by a giant scorpion.

Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

whats worse than death getting your nuts ripped of by a rabid racoon

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

what did the girl said to the stalker? i dont know cuz if i did, i would be a stalker

Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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