Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

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Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

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How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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Black people are innocent.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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