one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

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Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

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News:Little boy found dead in old man's white van. Turns out the old man goes to the store and when he comes back the little boy chokes on an apple.

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A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

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What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Excuse me waiter! What the hell is this fly doing on my soup? I believe it's swimming on it, sir.

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What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

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Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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How can you tell if a duck is behind you? Turn around

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Thank you very much for being so kind to me throughout the years. I have never known a better man. Rest in peace.

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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A blonde goes to school, and completes a difficult math problem.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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whats purple and attacks like a bear? a purple bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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