Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

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What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

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A British man walks into a dentist's office.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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what do you call your mom? mom

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because it is a horse and doesn't understand English. It gets confused about it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, upending a few tables along the way.

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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Roses are red Violets are blue The last time I saw your mom I made you

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What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

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Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

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person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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