this kid named terry stockton thought it was funny to get someone in the ankle lace then the kid got up and pucnched him in the face so hard he had a seizure

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whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? To get to the other side.

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Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

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Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

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why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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Austin do your class work. Quit looking at anti-jokes. Yes you the one that goes to RRHS.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

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A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

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An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

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GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

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What's hard and orange on the outside, and squidgy in the middle? A tanned man's head

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Depends how you look at it, I like some girl, she and that girl gets along, I get along with the two girls, and yeah, I make them fight to the death as I consume the weakest one and make the new one my wife of darkness! Well, actually, threesomes, but NEVAH, NEVAR!! *shakes fist towards the skies* with another man! Now if my waifu wants to have some fun with a girl, I say why not (and then she asks if I want to join always so far), its genetics, you know, each caveman had like 600 wivus and he did not have time to bang them all, now let those genes go trough MAN for a couple of millenia, and he becomes the KING OF DEMONS... ME! Those other scumbags are a whole other story. Oh, and the 600 wivus did either go without sexytime, or you know... I mean you do KNOW that women are like comfortable naked together and yeah...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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