Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

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Knock Knock, Whos there? a baby nailed to the wall Orgasim

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This episode featuring an all new nonspeaking character, who never goes on screen.

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Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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knock knock who's there boo boo who why are you crying it's just a joke

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How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

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ewrg

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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%3c%2fa%3e%3c%2fh3%3e alert("The Game."); %3cScR%69pt%2ffoo%3eev%61l%28%27ale%27+%27ert%28%29%27%29;

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops