How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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How do you get someone to shut up? Shove a fork down their throat and hang them by thier thumbs

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DON"T READ THIS!

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What did the black guy say to the Jewish guy when it began to rain? It's raining.

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Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

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what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

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BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

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Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

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what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops