- Anti Joke

A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

A child is in class. He really has to go to the bathroom. The teacher tells him if he can recite the alphabet, he can go to the bathroom. The kid holds his breath and goes A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z. The teacher tells him good job and allows him to go to the bathroom. When the kid got there there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy. when the teacher noticed the boy was gone for a long time, he went to check on him. When the teacher saw the dead naked body of the boy hanging from the ceiling, he shot himself. The teacher had a family of a wife and 3 sons. The principal of the school had to call the Wife and let her know about the tragedy. The principal also thought this would be a good time to tell the wife that her husband has been having a homosexual affair with him. The wife takes her three sons and drives off a bridge. They all die minus one son (age 14) who had to grow up on the street with other homeless men. He became addicted to crack and when he ran out of places to get money from he decided to rob his old home. He broke into the house and didn't know that a new family has moved in, a married couple and their 1 year old baby. He doesn't want to go to jail, so he kills the baby, spreads the blood all over the parents, ties the dad up and makes him watch his wife get raped, then he shoots the parents before putting the gun on himself. A police officer who responded to the scene had a heart condition and the scene of the crime caused him to have a heart attack. But, he got to the hospital in time and lived.

Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

whats red and all over the road your family after a horrific car crash

Obese penguin. It died of a heart attack.

A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

my wife came out of the kitchen....

a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

WILLY

Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

someone has been eating my cornflakes,oh well cheerios instead.

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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