What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

Whats funny? Your face.

once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

HOLY COW!

Atheism

Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

black people swimming

a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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