a blonde and a brunet are in an elevator. a man walks in the brunet says to the blonde "he has dandruff, he needs head and shoulders.' then the blonde says "we can give him head, but how can we give him shoulders."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A lysdexic man trys to rite a joek... the people who tried reading it got confused and offered help in rewriting it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You can lead a horse to water, and you can pick your friends, but you can't sneeze with your eyes open.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats fat and gay joe diragi

thumb_up thumb_down -7

a skinny sumo wrestler

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was 6 scared of me? cause i ate 9

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops