How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? A: Pick him up and suck on his wang!

why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

if you don't like this you're gay

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

roses are red violets are blue my dick hurts blue waffles

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Why did the chicken cross the road? They had a sale on dresses on the other side.

What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

#Hanging Degus

Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

Q. Whats Red and yellow and has braces? A.Pierre-Louis

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? A good example of friendly competition.

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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