Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

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What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

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How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

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What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

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what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

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How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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