Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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guess what? bannanas

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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