How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? No one... you have no friends.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

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This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Starving.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

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What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

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Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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