Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Why didn't the Mother packed her son's lunch? Because her son Timmy likes to go to the canteen

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops