How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

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Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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Communism hehe xd

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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an ethopian thanksgiving

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A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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There are two cows standing in a field eating grass. The first cow says "moo", the second cow says "Thats funny, I was about to say that".

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops