what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

wut du u cull a niggre whos wyte nut a niggre

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

I don't always browse the internet. But when i do i prefer Anti Joke.con

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Want to hear a joke You're Adopted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...