Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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Have you tried Ethiopian food? -no -well it's really good

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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wut du u cull a niggre whos wyte nut a niggre

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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