i had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The first train go fowards at 250 mph, and the second train takes a left, how many pancakes are on my rooftop? - The answer is purple because aliens don't dribk coffee

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What sucks more than being married? Being shot in both kneecaps

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Granny porn!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's green and can read your mind? Nothing. Some people thinks the answer is a plant but don't listen to them because they are wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops