What did the man say to the teacup? Nothing. He was drunk and on the floor.

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Tucker Rivera

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su algato es en fuego

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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DON’T HIT KIDS!!! NO, SERIOUSLY, THEY HAVE GUNS NOW. Via: Pingzic collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

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What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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What did the angry asian man do after he crashed his car? He died of serious head trauma and internal bleeding.

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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Darnell has a 2 ounce gold chain around his neck. Gold is worth $1,639 per ounce. Where did Darnell steal the gold chain from?

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I had a quad when I was in high school, she was pretty but it was hard to get her out of the wheelchair.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 3, according to Mr. Owl

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why was the boy sad? because.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops