yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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#IsaiahAfterAD&B

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

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what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

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What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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penis in the camel

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god."

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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