An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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black people

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SUCK MY NUTS

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copy me and i will kill you

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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