I went to school. Then I came home.

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

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asdasdasdasd

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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Why did the Gay person fall down? He got shot.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

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An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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