Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

if 5+5=10 then 7+9=52

why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

What's big and purple? Barney

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

What's worse...a thousand dead babies in one joke...or one dead baby in a thousand jokes?

What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

What did the man order at KFC, in Miami? A face.

Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

What do you call 5 black guys at the bottom of the ocean? scuba divers

the redsox

What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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