Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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What's green and red? A frog in a blender

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I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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An Irishman, a Jew, an Asian, and a Priest all walk into a bar This is an example of a well-balanced community

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Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

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What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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speak now or forever hold your pee

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What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

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Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

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One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops