How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

Did you hear about the Irish man that accidently killed himself,he farted in the bath & drowned trying to smell it

"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

Womens rights

Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

what is funnier than 24.....?????? 69. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. IT IS FUNNY BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE ME AND YOUR MAMA

I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

0 1 this is a sad sad world.

How do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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