A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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Id like to apologize for the one below (near the end yeah at the very end yeah that near you fuck!) When I said I give candy to etc etc I did mean I do not give candy to... Well... Nothing male, and I do not apologize, thank you. Shortie: Me as a Sociopath vs Sociopath with faster gunplay: So A Sociopath moved into my neighborhood, he arrived at my place and said hey you? You the sociopa... "BOOM" Moral: Shoot first, listen later... And if you hear something keep shooting... Anyway that was not the Sociopath but I got him eventually.

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Why does Beyonce sing "to the left, to the left"? Because that's where a box of everything you own is

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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Nickelback.

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Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

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What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

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"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

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Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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