Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

What happened to the boy who wnt through puberty? He bacame a man. There is nothing funny about a perfectly normal expirience that everyone goes through wether they like it or not.

A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

Fat? Jesse Z

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

A drunk guy walks into a car

Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

Whats from Hattersley? Someone who lives in Hattersley.

whats long and black? a baton

What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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