Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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One man's trash is another dyslexic man's shart.

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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you know what hurts, a revolver bullet in your brain.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

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What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

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What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

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Why didn't you hit the little mexican boy riding a bike? - it's probably was not your bike and it would have been against the law if you did so it was the kind thing to do -AHW

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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