Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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A bear comes across some people on a camping trip. But he then promptly leaves, because bears aren't inherently aggressive unless caring for their young or if they are provoked.

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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A man goes to the store to buy a kitten. While there, he decides to buy two because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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What happens when a Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. He gets a broken nose.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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KILL WHITEY

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Maths.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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