Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

A black man walks into a bar in Alabama, he then proceeds to have a couple of drinks and leaves.

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...