Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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whats gay and american? a gay american

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(Insert joke here)

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didnt it got eaten

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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Why did the White man scream when he saw a Black man? Because he was scared.

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? When he first entered the world, Chicken was a lonely bird. Nobody else liked him. Not even his mother. He was small and scrawny, and whenever the farmer came to feed the pigs or shear the sheep, he would get scared and hide in between two pieces of wood. One day Chicken woke up and his family was gone. Although they had never loved him, his heart was tender, and he was desperately concerned for them. After hours of searching for them, he overheard Cow speaking to Horse: "It's a tragedy, really. They were such a happy family. But now their off to the land of KFC, forever lost in the sea of chicken wings. But Chicken was determined to change his family's fate. He escaped the barn and ran into the woods. There he traveled day by day, and at night he hid from the hungry wolves. Life in the forest was tough, but no tougher than the loss of loved ones, so he kept going. On and on and on, until the forest ended and the city began. It was a new world to Chicken. He had never seen so many different buildings and contraptions. His eyes had never before held the wonder of the majesty of such a strange place. After traveling through the dangerous alleys of the city, he finally found it: the terrible land of KFC. The place where humans' dreams begin, but chickens' end. The place of horror and death and unfairness. The place that summarized Chicken's whole life. He was here now. The only thing separating him from his family was a road. A road that was so small compared to his previous trials, so incomprehensibly tiny when placed next to the gaping hole in his broken heart. So the chicken crossed the road. Then he got hit by a bus.

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Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.

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Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

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What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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Why couldn't the Asian man satisfy a woman? He was in a coma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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