Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

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Just gonna stand there and watch me roar. But that's alright because I am a dinosaur.

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

Face...the other white meat!

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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