Hey

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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penis

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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This is not a joke.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

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how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

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so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

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Error 37.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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A man died in a sky-diving accident. What was the last thing that went through his mind before he died? His feet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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