A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and get hit by a car.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

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You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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What's worse than finding a worm in ur Apple? Finding a worm in ur poop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops