A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

sky silverstein

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

Why did the black man shoot the white guy? the white man was about to hurt the black mans family.

what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

What happened to the boy who survived a tragic car accident?? He stepped out of the car and got hit by a semi.

Three mexicans walk into a bathroom they all had to go pee.

What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

What do you get when you rub 2 redheads together? Fire.

What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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