hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

whats worse than taking a refrigerator to the face? the holocaust and AIDs

Unfortually last night Andrew McNeil was studying soo hard that his head exploded and the next day at school, his friends found out and then cheered with laughter and happieness.

Chuck Norris walks in to a bar then many people greet him because of his celebrity status.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

Your momma is such a slut, that she has unprotected sexual intercouse several times throughout any given day, with many different men.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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