Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

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Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

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Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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i hate non minorities!

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Do you know what God said to Hitler as he approached the gate of heaven? ??????????????????

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops