Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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