Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? That's right.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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Why was Armando unable to be found by his friend Ashley ? A: They both were murdered 7 years ago, and bodies are unable to do anything if they lost their soul that was with that body.

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

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A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

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Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops