Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

where did little suzie go during 9/11 EVERYWHERE...

Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

AND

Why was Rebecca Black beaten with a pole when she sang Friday? It was Saturday

A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

Why couldn't the mute kid tell his mom the house was on fire? Casue he fell down the stairs and broke his hands...

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

How does Batman's mom call him home for supper? Nothing. Batman's mom is dead.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

Q. What's white, has an orange bill, and looks like a swan? A. a swan

why did the girl fall off the swing ? because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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