A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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Austin do your class work. Quit looking at anti-jokes. Yes you the one that goes to RRHS.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? Trying to sell a used truck with dead baby stains all over it.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo beep beep.

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It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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